Different by the Fire
by phantrashnumber1
Summary: Weaving absentmindedly through the crowd, Dan notices a boy in the distance, a young man around his age, staring, entranced by the fire and the dying embers. First phanfic please R&R! Better than it sounds, I promise.


**Different by the Fire**

phantrashnumber1

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, the brown haired boy made his way through the crowd of smiling adults with their elderly and young children happily rolling around in the snow; the kids didn't care about ruining the pristine clothes they were stuffed into before the inevitably boring New Year's Eve party they were sure to attend after the bonfire party, which was held at the bottom of the skiing piste every year. He glanced around, not being able to hear the conversations because of the headphones on his head blaring his favorite Muse album, but he was rather content by just looking at the people and their interactions. What he loved about this night was that, while being very exciting for other people and the frenzy was high, he found it extremely relaxing and theraupetic in its monotonous ways. He was just about to have done a full circle of the crowd when he spotted him.

The bonfire was placed on the right side of the crowd, and a group of people were huddled around it, warming themselves up or just watching the fire with friends and family, chatting about New Year's resolutions and vowing for a better year. Dan had already looked that way and didn't see anything out of the ordinary, but now that the crowd had thinned ever so slightly, what he saw intrigued him. There, standing a meter away from the fire, was a boy in his early twenties, maybe late teenage years, staring at the fire, completely alone, completely still, completely entranced by the dancing flames rising to the sky. It was as if there was an aura of calmness around this boy, as if he was in his own personal bubble and everyone around him acknowledged and respected that, keeping slightly away so as to not disturb him.

Dan noticed he was just standing in the middle of two groups of people, staring at someone far away, and probably looked crazy, with a bewildered expression and mouth left slightly agape, so he inconspicuously glanced around to make sure nobody saw him and moved off to the side, behind the ski pass selling shed which was currently empty and dark. There he leaned on the wooden wall and kept on looking at this magnificent stranger. This also gave Dan a better look at his face. The young man – who he could now see was probably in his early to mid-twenties and not still in his teenage years – had sharp features; high cheekbones with a strong chin and a very angular cut to his jaw, complemented by his ebony haired fringe, which was currently slipping over his cerulean blue eyes, but the mysterious boy made no move to brush it away, too engrossed in the almost white flames.

Kids were surrounding the bonfire as well and were actually getting dangerously close, at least enough to make Dan uncomfortable, and started to gather up the half fake half real snow in their tiny gloved hands, before throwing it clumsily in the fire, creating an instantaneous chemical reaction as the flames burst up momentarily, before quietening down again, weaker than before. The kids seemed to enjoy the happening and sang chorused "oooooh!"s and "aaaaaah!"s, before dropping to their knees to repeat their actions several times over, not noticing that the fire was growing weaker and weaker each time.

The hidden boy returned his gaze on the subject of his interest and was almost shocked to see the intensity of his gaze that was directed to the ever so slowly dying embers and flames, almost as if he were silently encouraging them, quietly pleading them, to carry on, to not stop raging with the power of life, to not go down without a fight, to not die… not like this.

His gaze equally softened as much as intensified as the fire kept dying, and, all too soon, the kids were satisfied with the complete destruction of the fire and got bored, skipping away to their parents. One little boy, clothed in a blue outfit with matching hat and gloves, wobbled his way from behind his parents legs where he had previously been hiding, and made his way to the now dead fire. He noticed a couple of embers were still alive and glowing slightly, probably by sheer willpower, and he leaned closer, and clumsily blew on it, as if trying to fuel it with his own breath. The entranced boy's gaze softened at the sight of this bright kid that seemed so committed to not letting the fire die, and gave him a gentle smile, not that the kid noticed, before he too was taken away by his parents.

The crowd had by now dispersed, and there were only the few odd groups huddled up still chatting but they were far away, not disturbing the boy who had now turned his attention back to the dying embers. There was only one piece of coal that had two glowing spots on it, the rest becoming a trash bin for anyone who wanted to dispose of their plastic cup, not caring about the raven haired male still staring at the dead fire. Most probably thought he was weird anyways. However, the boy still did not give up, and kept on staring at the dying ember for the whole duration of its life, feeling like it deserved that much at least.

The brown haired teen was still staring intently at the lonely guy, and without thinking really, pushed himself from the wall he had been leaning against and made his way around the young man, so as to not disturb him, and silently came up behind him.

The fire had now completely died, and there was not even a piece of coal glowing, all that was left was a black goo resembling a lot to tar and grey ashes, some even littering the pristine snow around the charcoal black metal container. The blue eyed boy didn't seem to notice that however, as he now gazed at the remains of the bonfire with a distant, absent-minded look in his eyes.

 _Probably having an existential crisis_ , Dan thought.

He wondered if he should interrupt this pale man's train of thought, but before he could make up his mind, his mouth had already taken the decision for him.

"Kind of chilly out here, isn't it?" As soon as the words registered in his mind, he deadpanned, fighting the urge to facepalm.

 _Really Dan? Did you really just say that? Oh god, how are you so fucking_ _ **awkward**_ _?_ The boy cringed.

The previously entranced male jumped at the sound of the near voice emanating from what he realized was a guy around his age, although it did take him a few moments to realize it, as he was momentarily lost in chocolate orbs of infinity that seemed to capture his gaze and pull him deeper and deeper.

He shook his head to clear it from weird thoughts, and properly looked at whoever interrupted his downward spiral of emotions and jumbled thoughts. He saw this boy was probably around his age, maybe in his late teenage years unlike his 23 odd years, and his gaze jumped from his frost bitten red cheeks, to his side fringe that framed his face, to his lips that puffed steam at regular intervals. Oh, and his eyes. Let's not forget those deep brown, gentle, soft, harmonious eyes.

Dan took in the other boy's frazzled surprise, and made to speak again, this time turning his body towards him and not the dead fire, extending a hand politely for the other boy to shake.

"Hi, I'm Dan. Sorry, I just noticed you were staring at the dead bonfire for a while, and, I don't know, you seem like a nice guy. What are you doing all alone? I mean, if you don't mind me asking. Maybe you're here with someone, and that's really none of my business but I didn't see anyone with you... UUHH- NOT THAT I WAS STARING, or anything, I mean, I was kinda over there and….." He let his flustered mess of a speech hang mid-sentence, not really sure himself what he was trying to say.

The older boy smiled a little, finding his nervous blabber oddly endearing.

"Pleased to meet you…. Dan? I'm Phil." He reciprocated the advance by taking the extended hand and shaking it. Dan marveled at the feel of Phil's hand. It was smooth, but with the occasional callous and cut, which made Dan wonder if he had a manual job, or if he was just prone to hurting himself.

Phil was also staring at their hands as they met, Dan's much smoother, long, pale fingers wrapping around his own, forming a solid grip, but staying gentle all the while. Both boys had equally icy hands, probably for not having gloves on a cold night like this one.

"So…" started Dan. "What are you doing here? If you don't mind me asking, that is."

Phil turned his body back to the fire, his gaze almost searching for any sign of life left as he answered.

"I come here every year with my family, it's what we've been doing ever since we bought an apartment here when I was a kid. This year they decided to stay home though, but I wanted to get a bit of fresh air" he stated.

He hesitated a second before continuing. "It's beautiful isn't it? The fire I mean. The life it has, even without being alive, it's one of the things that resembles life and the will and strength to live the most, more than us humans ever will…" he left the sentence hanging, seemingly too lost in his own thought. Dan had been entranced by his deep 'speech', and was still at loss for words.

Phil seemed to snap out of his reverie and turned to Dan, his attention now completely devoted to the boy before him, a bright smile on his face. Dan thought he would go blind any second now, the pure happiness that bloomed on his face within a split second, a supernova in itself. He glanced a bit lower and noticed his tongue, peeking at the edge of his mouth, seemingly trying to wriggle its way out in between his white teeth. He was still at loss for words.

"So, what are you doing here?" Phil asked Dan, giving him his undivided attention.

"Umm…" Dan snapped out of _his own_ reverie, and shook his head lightly, trying to clear it, before answering. "I also come here almost every year, mostly to people watch. It's fascinating, especially with the different ethnicities and age groups you find on such occasions. I'm surprised I never saw you before."

"Oh, I don't normally stay this late, my family and I get here just to watch the torchlight show and for the dressed up Santa to arrive. We have to leave to get to a dinner usually, but this year it was cancelled so… I decided to come by myself, but then I got close to the fire and…. You know the rest," he finished sheepishly.

"Oh." Dan replied dumbly. _Seriously Dan? 'Oh'? Is that really the best you could come up with?!_ He mentally kicked himself.

What he didn't know is that while he was busy arguing with himself in his head, Phil was paying very close attention, finding it both adorable and hilarious how easy it was to read the awkward young man's thoughts and expressions. Endearing. He was adorable. He stopped the younger boy's thoughts before they could escalate to anything bad, interrupting him instead with a question that frazzled the poor kid's mind more than any existential crisis ever could.

"Hey, do you think you might want to hang out tomorrow? Like, at the bar perhaps?" he nudged his head towards the bar behind them, the one that made Dan's favorite hot chocolate and had a really cozy atmosphere, with wood walls, log chairs with pillows and blankets and several fireplaces lighting the place.

He blinked. Once. Twice.

"Umm, I, err… Sure." Dan blanched. What was wrong with him? He was usually more confident, or if not so awkward he would crack jokes at his expense to break the tense atmosphere.

Phil smirked, loving seeing Dan's reactions. What was wrong with him today? Phil asked himself. He was usually a lot less outgoing, a lot less forward, especially when he showed an interest in someone. This bravado façade was new to him, seemingly coming out because of this gorgeous lad before him.

"Great! Do you want to, like, err, exchange phone numbers then?" He asked through his lashes, as he bent his head to reach for his I-phone in his shiny coat's pocket.

Dan nodded mutely, also reaching for his own mobile in the back pocket of his black skinny jeans (which Phil appreciated very much, mind you).

Once that was done Phil glanced at the time displayed on his screen, his eyes widening for a split second before snapping his head up and looking around them. This prompted Dan to do the same, and to his surprise, they were the last ones there, everyone else having dispersed and left to their nightly activities. A look down at his own phone told him it was in fact quarter past midnight, and that he should probably head home now.

They both looked at each other, and, without an exchanging of words, they smiled and waved, a promise of fun for this day and all the future ones they would spend together, a life where they get to know each other's quirks and fears, one where Dan is loud and Phil is sweet, although at first it may not have been that way.

Then again, we're all a little different by the fire.


End file.
